At Home With The Trollops

Well, we've done it. After an arduous morning yesterday spent scrubbing the floor like charwomen from the Olden Days, we had our inspection (all thumbs up, hurray, and welcome back to our bond), we packed our remaining junk into Reto's mother's tiny car, we had a final coffee at Gossip, and we moved to the home of Reto's sister and brother-in-law*. Incidentally, last night was the foggiest night I can ever recall enduring, which made all the driving kind of terrifying. As far as I am aware Reto hasn't driven a car in the better part of a year or so, and I still find the whole right-hand-side-of-the-road thing a bit terrifying, so in combination with being unaccustomed to being in cars at all, my unfamiliarity with the roads and my empathic terror for Reto at having to drive at all, the fact that the fog meant we couldn't really see anything was really the icing on the cake. We didn't have a terrible accident, though, no one was injured, and so I suppose it was a resounding success.

In related news, I can hardly express how excellent it was to not sleep on the air mattress last night. At one point I woke up when I was turning over and was surprised to find that I was lying on a relatively solid surface and wasn't making waves of turbulence with my every movement. Reto turning over didn't threaten to heave me onto the ground, and we didn't both end up smooshed together and basically touching the ground in the middle of the mattress (which tends to happen, because as it turns out the heavier person is like some sort of evil black hole on an air mattress. By which I mean that Reto (surely the heavier person**? Even though I am about 8m taller than him these days, sigh) would tend to make a big dip in the mattress where he was lying on it, and if I made the mistake of coming within a certain distance of him (hard to control when you are asleep) I would roll helplessly into the dip and (hopefully) end up poking him with my elbow or headbutting him in the face).




* For the sake of entertainingly ambiguous and not-at-all-unkind bloggy anonymity, I am going to call our new residence the House Of Trollop (HOT)
** I just found a set of scales in the HOT and have weighed myself for the first time in a good 6 months or so and can definitively say that I win the "not being responsible for the air mattress vortex" competition. Yay me.